In case you hadn't noticed...

Now, I've been saying this to a few people for some time now, and while everyone I know vehemently denies it, I'm beginning to think I've become a little (just a tad) lazy in updating the weblog. I had my suspicions earlier in the year, and I thought I could remedy it by converting to sporadicism. I've come up with a convoluted excuses through the year, but I think it is time to tell you, the reason I am so infrequent in updating is: I am a lazy fuck.

I'm sorry you had to hear that.

Preaching

I've recently discovered religion, and found inner peace and all that. The best part is, the religion is totally compatible with my pastamancical trainings, which taught a form of pasta-based mysticism. That's right, I've converted to Flying Spaghetti Monsterism. The website is an open letter sent to some school board in some out-of-the-way place called Kansas (kan-SAW). I've never heard of it. There's a pretty graph too, and there is no getting around that it shows nothing but facts, and who can argue with pirates, anyway?

So yeah. I've been doing nothing again. Just can't get enough of that sweet, sweet nuthin'. Peaking. Buying plot holes. To prepare for another sorceress-attack, see. I hope I win. I want to be a hero. Nobody seems to appreciate my litter-cleaning efforts in the nearby plains, or my cyrpt-cleansing efforts in the...cyrpt. Bet you didn't see that one coming, eh? Heh, heh, I am teh funny.

Booyah!

Yeah, I'm black. What is it, though, with me always commenting on the title of my post at the beginning of a post? Do I have no creative talent so I have to make up for it by sticking in as much filler as possible or something? Well, 100% of my readers (how many is that? Me? That sounds about right) would say otherwise, but from what I've seen of those readers (still me - you need to remember this bit to get the upcoming joke), the crowd I attract here doesn't seem to have much in the way of brains or taste. Might I just add, in case any of my readers misunderstood, that I am not really black. That was just in reference to the title.

The reason for such willy-nilly booyah-ing is the onset of a strategy for beating that consarned Sorceress. Plot holes. I hear they work great. I'll try them, when I have some time.

Without the title-commenting part, that post had plenty of substance, right? I don't need filler, right? Right?

Whoa, dude, I am so sporadic right now. Hehe.

In case you don't get it, the title is meant to be taken in a slightly slurred, hoarse voice, id est, like someone high on cannabis. Funny, eh?
But yeah, welcome to Sporadicburg, population: me, you, and that guy in his underwear holding a knife behind you. But that's not what the post is about, despite what the title may have you believe. Damn that title, he's always making trouble.

Yeah, I know I said I would battle the Sorceress soon. A couple of times now. Well, I did battle her a couple of times. Problem is, I just can't seem to hit her. A'stabbin' her with a Wand of Nagamar doesn't work (I was told to take it by that crackpot in Seaside Town), so I throw my spells at her, but something always seems to get in the way of them. gherkinicity, my pet ghost pickle on a stick, is a big help, but he's not too bright, and he only ever follows my lead, not my commands; that is to say, he'll only attack her if I actually hit her. On the numerous occasions I miss, he just stands there. Floats, I mean. Which is bad, because then I yell at him, and as I'm yelling, I'm staring at him, and the sight of an impaled undead pickle freaks me out more and more as I go. Which puts me off. Which makes it harder to hit the NS. Which causes Big G to do nothing. Which unnerves me. You understand, I'm sure. And if you don't you've obviously never seen something as goddamn creepy as a ghost pickle on a stick. But yeah. I try when I have time. I got a Pilates tape a fortnight ago, so I'm spending a lot of my meditating time Pilate-ing, rather than stabbing yetis for fun and profit. Therein lies the cause of my infrequentness.

That, and I'm a lazy little bitch.